Food for those who don't like food.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Bad Day

A moment of silence.

the current USA to Canada exchange rate is one american dollar for every 1.12 with no signs of increase. When I was in toronto it was at 1.43. When I was in vancouver it was at 1.27. The second time it was at 1.19, it has not dropped that low in decades.

Rest in Peace, american dollar, it was a rough fight. You just gotta face it, you've lost this battle. We need a new strategy.

and that is...GET MORE MONEY! MUAHAHA!

Total needed for Montreal to date = $8953.04 USD estimated.

Monday, April 24, 2006

My Struggle.

Is it possible to be blacklisted by your friends. Is my honesty really that off-putting? I wish someone would just tell me and end my misery.

There's a gathering of YWAMers sometime in May, and no one is telling me a thing about it. The sadness. I guess I just won't get to go. I'm not big on party-crashing.

I will, try to make this area a little more positive, yes it has been down, but this is not only a public blog it's what I'm thinking, and that means it's not always put together with kindness and good judgement. It does however mean my mind is as random as you all thought.

Wish you all a happy birthday in may, then. =P

Thursday, April 20, 2006


Dear Coffee.

I miss you, I dearly truely do. You where my first true love and it seems as if every day before you was just fabricated to make me feel comforted in that I had life without you. Sadly I don't have that great life. I had you, and you were all I ever wanted. Sweet Tempting, yet warm and bold like a rustic wool blanket by the fire with a warm cup

All my good memories this past year involve you. You were everywhere in my life, you busy mistress you, with me, the koreans, even a kiwi occasionally. You kicked my first love of tea out a window. While horribly unkind, she was comforted by the acceptance of a brit or two down the road.

Now though, I just miss you. Someday when I can have you again, will you be mine?


- An Overworked Barista.

Purpose for my Life

Mood music. Makes the world go 'round.

Day Fourty - One (Cont.)

Okay. Feeling alive is good, and while everyone still thinks I'm crazy I like being alone at night running around like the crazyness I can be. It's my release, because some days a lot can happen that will wear you down. I'll get back to what I started before with the whole keep your mouth shut but right now I feel to disperse a theory. Today...was rough. All it took was just one little thing and then the world seemed to fall on me pushing something else down. Those Dreary Domino Days. Truth be told, I have a theory about domino days. Unlike the game I feel they start in the middle of the board and you can go either way, but like the dominos once it's started, you just can't stop it. Now the good thing about domino days is that you they are just that, one day, or many days, but nothing more. You can have the good, but then you have the bad. If I believed in Karma I would mumble something that would be the intellectual equivalent of a room of stoners --- not to diss Karma. I think it's a great example of taking a religious idea and extrem-ifying it.

Think about it. What I know about god, is that things happen for a reason. Now Karma is the idea that everything that happens gets it's just rewards. Materialism in it's raw form really. Buying things. Doing the extra work so you can slack later, now that's just bad business. A tit for tat attitude get no one anywhere and it all comes done to the world's biggest lie. It's all about me. In reality, if life were all about me I would be both bored and bothered. It would be the raw equal of a tv that only played reality tv (and not top chef or next food network star reality tv, the really gritty fluff that comes through and impregnates the airways with it's spawn...can anyone say The Apprentice...MARTHA STEWART EDITION!)

I'll leave a moment of silence for all of you to shudder. Now these days I've learned can still be about you. In that, it may be the only thing you have any control in changing, bringing me back to my first point. How many people have seen the effects of gossip. See, I've somewhat made a friend. Anthony (he's from Gana) and has a pretty good grip on the world---yet he talks a lot. So much in fact it gets in the way of his work a lot. We work at starbucks, which can be the best and worst place to stop and chat. Now I love this guy but he does like to pay attention to people more than work. The past few days all I've heard after he's left is Anthony this, Anthony that, real pure unadulterated hate that will just seep through your pores.

I hate that. I even know hate is a strong word but it doesn't matter this time. I hate that people thrive off of tearing down other people. I hate also that I've done it too. Not to Anthony, but to my boss, because he has serious issues. Issues that really do prevent him from being even an adequate boss (and that's being kind). Yet everyone wants to cry mutiny, but as soon as he comes around the world grows mute.

So. I want to just scream some days. Still, I'm not cool enough to start the revolution. What I can do is keep an eye out for my dude, Anthony from Gana (how can you not like a guy who listens to tribal music on his cellphone to relax?)

In other news.

I'm reading Luke. =D

Stitched Up.

Sometimes there are those days, those moments where whatever you think you should say you should just...not. I hate that moment.

Enter Day Fourty - One

This morning I ran. I woke up at the crack of dawn (quite literally) and I just ran. Tommorrow, even though I froze, I may do it again. Running is something that even though I'm not very good at it, it allows me to feel alive. Heart Racing, breath dying, that thump as your body tries to keep up with you when all you want to do is move. It's a rush, and a kick.

In fact I would quite glady go at it right now.

In fact.

Be Right Back.

Friday, April 14, 2006

Alas, Dreams are things we're made of.

Day Thirty - Five


Dreams are weird, because I hear about them all the time but I don't have them. Not the pysical ---HELP ME THE THREE-HEADED MONKEY IS EATING MY---OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS, THAT WAS SO GORRAM REAL! ---kinda dreams. I have the, It would be great to do this, kinda dreams. Now if I could I would fancify this mess with lots of italics, but evil mac of doom lacks the technology to allow me to do such. Darn Safari. I do have the latter. Which is healthy, I suppose. Granted, I wouldn't mind the former. this is just forming word diarhea on the screen.

I do have something relatively important to say though...I am so broken. Mentally and physcially broken. I still haven't sent the application in, because I'm not sure if that's supposed to be. Everything is just, tearing me out, inside, upside-down, and over. It isn't healthy...I know that much. I snap easily right now. For lack of a better word I guess you could say I was a bit too brittle. Like circles on the paper. Round and round, over and over, eventually breaking through, where all your left with is these holes. I feel like swiss-cheese dangit.

If only god would wanted a reuban, I'd be perfect. Grill me oh, might-y grill-smiting-person thing.

So...pray for me. Please? I like chedder better than swiss anyways.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Options create CHAOS.

I've lost count of the days for this entry. I will go back and redo it, it's probably the most obsessive compulsive thing I've stuck to these days.


I should be asleep. It's 11:20, and tommorrow is my physical test. That sounds just like it is, I get to go out to our wellness clinic and they get to test just how healthy I really am. It's part of committing to something and attempting to stay to it the best I can. This case is a really off one. I committed to moving. The real get up and go kind, I committed to get off my arse every day. Heck, I've gotten up at a respectable hour this past week and have been going to bed (for me) very early.

Here's another odd thing I've noticed. I want to know more about cooking...add to that, I want to learn more about cooking from an actual school! Yet, I still don't want to really run or own a restaurant. I just want to make things that good people will come to get, and I'll get that chance to chat and share. I want regulars. I want relationships built through good food and good word. I want to put a heart into what I'm making and show them...heck I can make some pretty gorram good scones. I blame a recent obsession with Food Network. Now for the real kicker...I was looking at schools in Vancouver. WAY out of my price range...for now.


I'm kind of back at one step at a time.

Wouldn't life be easier if there was just a big glaring sign hovering above your head that maybe you couldn't see but every else could. That way if you didn't know what you wanted, maybe somebody else did.

Then I would give them a Pumpkin Apricot Scone.